It's not me. It's the car.

*Soooo I’m kinda behind in blogging, so for me, let’s just pretend it’s summer, just for a second. Okay. Thanks. So I just bought a brand new shiny red sports car. Very red. I feel very fast and the furious in it. Except it’s the suburbs. Mini-vans are the enemy. Strange things have been happening. At first just little things. Men blatantly checking me out at red lights. Old men, young men, it didn’t matter. Men waving at me at red lights. FYI that’s kinda uncomfortable. I started to wonder. Is summer making men crazy? Is this a new way to pick-up? Am I just looking damn fine? Huh. But then this happened. I’m minding my own business at a red light when some random guy hollers at me: “hey sexy” (yeah I looked). A few cars over 4 guys are all giving me the hey, hey head nod. The guy who I assume was “the leader” due to his white tank top and the toothpick in his mouth (seriously): “hey babe, you’re looking reallll sexy”. Hot Spanish accent (I can’t make this shit up really). “Can I get your number,” said through toothpick. I take the easy way out, *smile*: “sorry I have a boyfriend”. “That’s cool. I have a girlfriend. He doesn’t have to know,” knowing grin. Laughter. Green light. Fast forward to me getting into my car in the movie theatre parking lot one night. Some random guy appears out of nowhere smiling like he knows me. He does not. “Hey there, I saw you getting into your car (car being the key word here. Like a moth to a flame I swear), liked the way you looked, and decided to be social” (wow). “I wanted to ask you to a movie, but looks like you are leaving. Do you want to have coffee with me sometime?’’. A movie date invite in the parking lot. Now that’s speed dating. I politely decline. The way I see it, this little story could have gone one of two ways. It’s a totally romantic story we tell our grandkids one day OR I’m next weeks cautionary tale on Dateline, my friend guiltily sobbing for leaving me alone. It’s like I’m driving around in my fav lil red dress. Men can’t help but look. She’s my wing car.